The recipe for Chocolate Walnut Fudge Scones, that is.

Here it is.  Exactly as I did it.

* First rule of baking with toddlers-send toddler out with Sweet Hubby, drink a glass of wine, assemble all ingredients ahead of time, drink a glass of wine, then throw all ingredients into a fan at one end of the kitchen.  This saves you the time it takes waiting for the toddler to accomplish the same thing.  Drink a glass of wine.  Now you may begin to reassemble your ingredients, bathe the cats, drink a glass of wine, and try to make something edible.

For Scones

What:

2 cups of all purpose flour-not five roses.  It doesn’t rise for some odd reason.
1/2 cup cocoa powder (I treated myself and used Lindt-available at gourmet shops)
1/4 cup packed brown sugar
2 1/2 teaspoon baking powder (*hint-don’t use last year’s)
1/2 tsp EACH baking soda and salt
1/2 cup cold butter, cubed
1 cup buttermilk
1 egg
1 tsp vanilla
1/4 cup chopped toasted walnuts (I used a *bit* more)

Fudge Icing

1 cup icing sugar
2tbsp cocoa powder
1tsp vanilla
2 tbsp of milk, approximately. Add a teaspoon or so more if you need to to make it spreadable. 
*hint-For body paint, triple the milk. (Stop licking the spoon!)

How:

Now mix all your dry ingredients together, and use a pastry cutter to cut in butter until it looks like coarse crumbs.  You CAN use two sharp knives, but you’ll be there all day, and frankly, I have better things to do.  Now, in a separate bowl, mix all your wet ingredients together.  Pour wet stuff into dry stuff all at once.  Sprinkle your walnuts over the top, then mix with a fork or spoon to form a sticky, soft dough.  Make sure you have a VERY well floured surface, and well floured hands.  Turn dough out onto floured surface and knead 6-10 times.  Now here’s where the actual recipe said something about patting it neatly into a 7X10″ rectangle, and cutting with a greased knife to make perfect triangles.  I couldn’t be arsed.  I used a tall glass, rolled in flour, as a rolling pin, rolled it out to about 1/2 ” thick, then rimmed the glass with flour and used it as a cookie cutter to make about 30 nice, round scones. 

Line a baking sheet with parchment.  If your oven is pants like mine, use an air-filled baking sheet that makes it harder for the oven to incinerate your scones while you’re washing dishes.  Bake at 400 for 18-20 min, or until they start to smell good.  If you smell smoke, you either forgot to trim the edges of your parchment, or you’ve left them in too long.  If you smell potroast, your oven needs cleaning. Badly. If you smell oranges, or burning toast, seek help immediately.  Remove to cooling racks.  Let stand until *mostly* cool.  Then ice.  (If you can’t figure out how to make icing from four ingredients, you have bigger problems than my lack of direction) The residual heat should melt the icing just a bit, making a nice, shiny glaze on the top.

Now try not to eat them all before anyone gets to witness your culinary prowess!

Hey mom, you always tell me, whenever I complain about Hurricane Owen, that we get the kids we deserve.

What the heck does that say about you?

XD

This

http://www.warehouse23.com/item.html?id=DSPKMB6000

and this:

http://www.warehouse23.com/item.html?id=TYV27000

and this:

http://www.gadgetshop.com/pws/ProductDetails.ice?ProductID=827

and this:

http://www.giantmicrobes.com/

and this:

http://www.humpingdog.com/

and this:

http://www.toyvault.com/swearbears/index.html

and last, but not least, all of these:

http://www.toyvault.com/cthulhu/index.html

Ok, you got me. It’s my Christmas list, actually. It’s all for me.

There are worse ways to do it than with lavender scented sheets, an endless supply of hot chocolate, snow on the ground outside and a big stack of brilliant books.  Being sick gives you time to slow down and listen to your own thoughts.  If you can hear them over the hacking, but why ruin a lovely visual?

Currently I’m thinking how much fun it is to have a toddler who wears mittens with dummy strings.  I couldn’t help myself while getting him dressed for “school” this morning.  Had to reach in behind his neck and give a little yank on the string.  Pretty soon he’ll be too big, and I won’t be able to make him punch himself in the head with just a little tug on a string.  These fleeting moments of parenthood, once missed, are lost to us forever.  I’m working on socks with dummy strings for Sweet Hubby.  I could give his string a little pull and he’d kick himself in the pills….

My sister suggested combining the two, and having him do jumping jacks every time he scratched his nose.

Too bad I like him, because it would have been funny.

This is why you shouldn’t blog on codeine.

This is your blog.

This is your blog on codeine.

Any questions?

Yesterday, my brand new dryer arrived.

I felt the same joy I felt the day I picked up my first brand new car.

This morning, the whole family piled into our minivan, drove to Canadian Tire and bought responsible, grown up things like energy efficient 13 watt outdoor flourescent bulbs, a wick and an antibacterial cleaner cartridge for our himidifier, and energy efficient LED Christmas lights.

It really didn’t seem like THAT long ago that Saturday morning meant sneaking in at dawn, and sleeping until it was time to get up, and start getting ready to go out again Saturday night.

What the hell happened?!

So today, being Wednesday, I’m home alone with Hurricane Owen while Sweet Hubby goes straight from one job to the next.

Usually Owen and I love our quiet days alone together.

But Owen isn’t feeling too well.

None of us are. The flu has made the rounds of our house in the last two weeks.  I also suspect that the “mini moo” he dug out of the recesses of the fridge, opened and ate with his fingers in the amount of time it took me to take a stepladder down to the dryer repair man, may have been a tad out of date.

Owen’s been kind of whiny and just not quite himself today. He napped very late, and didn’t get up until I woke him for supper, which he steadfastly ignored.

Then he threw up all over the hat rack. The one we keep in the kitchen to hold dish towels, aprons etc.

The hat rack that was standing on the floor I’d only just finished vacuuming, washing and waxing.

Sigh.

I got him cleaned up, and changed into nice clean jammies, still warm from the newly repaired dryer. Then I gave him a syringe of children’s Gravol, and told him that it would make his tummy feel better. 

Edit: I always think of the best things AFTER the fact.  I’ve decided NEXT time this happens I’ll just roll him in sparkles and send him to Gramma’s house)

For the uninitiated, children’s Gravol is sticky. Like, CORN SYRUP sticky.

Wait for it.

Quick as a flash, he lifted his shirt, stuck the end of the syringe in his belly button and squirted.

We managed to get the Gravol INTO him on the second try, after offering a little clarification as to HOW it would make his tummy feel better.

Now I’m going to bed.

This lovely little article was ganked from

littlehoudini

, who ganked it from another friend.

Thanks.  I’m posting it here because it’s EXACTLY what life is like everyday, living in a nebulous no-man’s land between fibromyalgia and lupus. (depending on which doctor you ask)

It’s the best and simplest explanation I’ve seen so far.  Now I just wish all the well meaning co-workers who see me every day, not LOOKING sick, as well as kind hearted in-laws who visit, rarely, only to clean my house AT me, since my housekeeping skills aren’t up to par, could read and understand.

Now add a two year old, shake well, and serve chilled.

Thanks Z.  I needed to read that.

Drinking white russians and watching the Bear in the Big Blue House “Potty time with Bear” episode.

Over, and over, and over…

Now THAT’S a Friday night to be proud of.

I AM teh cool.

Still, I suppose it’s progress.

The other morning Hurricane Owen quietly got up out of his big boy bed, stripped naked, pee’d on the lid of the laundry hampster…um that’s HAMPER (Mommy’s been drinking a bit) and got back into bed.

He was very proud to show me his dry diaper at 6:30am.